From The Paul Mitchell Show (Broadcast Wednesday, June 6th, 2007)
SKINEMA written by Chris Nieratko
"FOUR STARS (Highest Rating). There are two kinds of people in this world:
Those who will take a book into the bathroom to read while sitting on the
toilet, and those who would never consider doing such a thing. This was the
subject of a SEINFELD episode, in fact.
For me, books and bowel movements do not go together. I may be a germaphobe
due to my Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, though there are likely many
non-OCD sufferers who feel the same as I.
I bring this up because if I WERE the kind of person who liked to read in
the John (George Costanza being one of those people), the Number One Best
Bathroom Book of 2007 would have to be SKINEMA, by Chris Nieratko.
o the uninitiated, the book at first appears to be a collection of porn
video reviews. Titles such as ART SCHOOL SLUTS, EVIL PINK 2, and BIG BOOTY
MOMS appear over small photos of the DVD box cover art, along with the
names of the director and video distribution company. Each film is rated,
10 being best.
For the most part, however, what follows aren't actual reviews. Nieratko
may reference the porn's title or actress or subject matter, but generally
uses them as jumping-off-points to rattle on with his own eyebrow-raising
anecdotes, observations, and myriad tales of misadventure, usually
involving sex, drugs, porn, and lots and lots more sex. He writes about
buddies, ex-girlfriends, his wife, former employers, as well as total
The book is a compilation of Nieratko's SKINEMA columns from VICE magazine.
Nieratko communicates with a compulsively readable, devil-may-care
openness. He is an amped-up, red-blooded schlemiel -- clever, snarky,
politically incorrect, often self-deprecating (and occasionally
self-defecating). He's a punk rock version of Woody Allen.
If I attempted to quote a typical passage from the book, due to the
language and subject matter I'd be thrown through a plate glass window by
the FCC. Suffice it to say, SKINEMA is highly recommended for those who
enjoy anecdotes and musings of an entertainingly rambunctious and deviant
On or off the toilet."
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© 2007 chrisnieratko.com