 Can I tell you a secret? You can’t tell anyone. Ok. To be honest, I’m more than a little giddy about my first book. It’s a very special time in a little writer boy’s life. It’s like my literary Bat mitzvah in a way. Except I don’t have to get circumcised again. (Sidenote: When I used to have to write copy for Gay men’s porno mags in the early 90s the editor insisted that I mention how each gentleman was uncut i.e. uncircumcised, despite the fact that they were clearly “cut.” I guess the gay community really loves the uncut look.)
I’ve been trying to pretend that the book isn’t that big of deal and generally I have very little time to acknowledge it with NJ Skateshop and NJ II taking up most of mine and my partner Steve’s time. But every once in a while, usually while watching The Nets playoff run, I think about it and smile. I have a book. It’s quite surreal to say. Especially since in my 31years on this planet I haven’t read many books. I doubt I’ll ever read my own either. I mean, I read it when I turned in the manuscript. The stories/memories in it kind of made me sick to my stomach, so I don’t think I’m going to put myself through that again.
Another thing that makes me kind of queasy is meeting you. Sorry, but it’s true. It’s not you, it’s me. You’re great. I love you. Don’t ever change. It’s just as Vice is plotting out my little book signing/reading tour it’s setting in that I’ll have to speak in front of large groups of people. I failed my public speaking class in college. Put me at a dinner table with 5, 10 people I’m a goddamn politician. I’ll have them hanging on my every word. Stick me in front of a room of strangers and my voice starts cracking. I think it has something to do with my 3rd grade talent show, when me and my buddy Dave did a comedy routine. And NO ONE laughed.
It looks like I’m going to be drinking a lot on this mini-tour. Drinking always seems to make things easier. I tried to explain that to the bandleader at my brother’s wedding when he made me give my best man’s speech as soon as everyone sat down, before anyone (including myself) could throw back a couple cold ones. Needless to say, I didn’t deliver my A-material.
I don’t know when the tour will be. They’re hinting at mid-May but I don’t have any answers. No one tells me anything. But when I know I’ll let you know. Maybe you can come out and heckle me. Or drink a beer with me. Or take me out to a strip bar. Or we can go fishing. Do you like fishing? I like fishing. No? That’s fine. We’ll figure something out. And it’ll be great. Promise. I’m going to the Vice office Friday. Maybe then I’ll know more and I’ll let you know where I’ll be and when. Right now it’s looking like Philly, Atlanta, Tampa, Austin, San Diego, LA, SF, Portland, Chicago and Boston. You’re going to come, right? You better or we’re breaking up. For real this time. I’ll talk to you later.
Heart,
Chris
P.S. I thought these images might be interesting to you. They are a few of the other cover options that were suggested for the book. There’s a few alternate Terry Richardson covers. And the other one (the tattooed gal’s ass and legs) is the cover that I shot, that was going to be the Final Cover but was ultimately scrapped for a better Terry cover. [click the book link at the top if you want to view the Final Cover] Hope you enjoy.
P.P.S. My web dungeon master seems to believe there is some value in me and my stupid signature. I beg to disagree but to humor him I’ve agreed to sign some stuff, check the promo section for more details.
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