My flight to Boston was only 4 hours later so I just sat at the airport, waiting to die. By noon I was in my hotel waiting for my radio interview on the Toucher & Rich show and then a book party at True East Skateshop.
The radio show was a lot of fun. The guys knew most of my work and asked me to tell some fun stories about Big Pun and Ritchie Sambora of Bon Jovi and they let me talk freely about my ‘PLEASE STAB PAUL PIERCE’ sign and went so far as to invite me to the Boston Garden with them for that night’s draft party. Luckily I didn’t because between me being the ‘sign guy’ and Danny Ainge making yet another bad trade for Ray Allen I would have been lynched.
Afterwards I went and got drunk with the good folks at True East Skateshop. Lindsay Lohan was in town and saw a crowd of cute boys and stopped to talk. We eventually went and drank with her at her bar, Kennedy’s. Her friend was a butt naked stripper at a fancy all nude titty bar called The Glass Slipper and we followed her to work to see if she really had a vagina. She most certainly did. Someone bought me a lap dance. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a lap dance in Boston, a good 12 years at least, in which time they must have instated some new distance-rule because I can say with all sincerity that I was closer to the girls on stage with a bartender, a beer cooler and a bar between us than I was for my private lap dance. I asked her, “Is there some law that you can’t be in the same room as me for the dance?” She ignored me and kept up her half-hearted sway to the music. I said, “Listen, I’m married. I’m not trying to get in your pants. I mean, if you were wearing pants, which you’re not. But you know what I mean. But someone spent $25 on this and I don’t feel as if you’re earning your pay.” She told me to kiss her ass and walked off. I shouted behind her, “HOW THE HELL CAN I DO THAT? YOU WERE 20 FEET AWAY THE ENTIRE TIME!”
The Skinema Tour continues this Saturday at the Skatepark of Tampa with free beer from Colt 45, free Red Bull and free stuff from Nike SB. Come on down. Maybe we’ll go to Mons Venus afterwards.
My flight to Boston was only 4 hours later so I just sat at the airport, waiting to die. By noon I was in my hotel waiting for my radio interview on the 
